The real meaning behind amp sales ads

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hunter

hunter

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Let's have a little fun :lol: :LOL:

Feel free to add your own interpretions :thumbsup:

THIS STATEMENT: "This amp is an absolute bargain."
ACTUALLY MEANS: "I got this for a killer price as a demo model and I only ask 300$ more than what I paid for it."

THIS STATEMENT: "I am only a home player now, so this is too much amp for my use."
ACTUALLY MEANS: " After spending 1000$ on power soaks, tubes, speakers and cables, I realise that the amp still sounds like crap. Also it has only 2 channels and 100W, I am gonna sell this to get a 3Ch 150W amp - ROCKN ROLL."

THIS STATEMENT: "Amp has recently been retubed by a qualified amp tech"
ACTUALLY MEANS: "I bought this quad of tubes of the bay for cheap and my friend has a bias rite. We threw them in and the amp still sounds mushy and britty, I am fed up, now you buy it and try if you're more lucky. If you are I will hear your clips and think 'DAMN' and look out to buy another one of the same amp and get some proper tubes biased by a pro."

THIS STATEMENT: "This amp has never been gigged and is absolutely mint"
ACTUALLY MEANS: "I would never take this amp on stage, I don't wanna embarrass myself with such bad tone."

THIS STATEMENT: "This amp definitely has its own thing going"
ACTUALLY MEANS: "The amp sounds wrong on all channels, I don't know for what kind of music style this tone is useful, maybe it has to be invented."

THIS STATEMENT: "Can cover any style from total clean to total all out metal mayhem"
ACTUALLY MEANS: "My Pod X2 can do the same, but much better."

THIS STATEMENT: "Amp was used by artist xxx from band yyy"
ACTUALLY MEANS: "Amp has been exposed to countless beer spill accidents, been treated badly by plane cargo workers and roadies and has run on full blast for every night of the last two years. It might smell a little weird and the Output Transformer has lost most of its function, and actually nobody knows the artist, but I tried my best to make his name sound cool and undergroundy."

THIS STATEMENT: "This amp sounds absolutely great!"
ACTUALLY MEANS: "... compared to my son's Gorilla, but the difference becomes neglectible once you compare both amps on the same cab."

THIS STATEMENT: "Only reason for selling is I have to thin the herd."
ACTUALLY MEANS: "I have already another amp on its way to me, and once this piece of crap has been sold I will get an Axe FX, a Tweaker and a 100W Metal Panel Marshall."

THIS STATEMENT: "This is an absolutely unique one off, special design by builder xxx."
ACTUALLY MEANS: "For unknown reasons the amp never sounded right, so the builder was tweaking the circuit for a while, which made it worse and worse, so he gave up and gave it to me for 1/3 of the normal price. I just got it for the looks and to show off, but now someone else can have this piece of junk - for just a little more than what I paid for it."
 
THIS STATEMENT: as everyone knows this is an English boutique amp that's in high demand
ACTUALLY MEANS: I'm getting sick and tired of this old C******d piece of crap and I'm willing to sell below what I've paid for it.

That's actually what I'm waiting for ;)

Giga
 
Dude.....you forgot the best one of all --

This amp has never left my smoke free home :jerkit:
 
steve_k":i12klvhs said:
Dude.....you forgot the best one of all --

This amp has never left my smoke free home :jerkit:


lol .... for some thats actually true though. i have one beat up 5150 i use for all my gigging/practice, and a few amps i have that never leave my home (home recording/studio use). i think this saying is funny though :lol: :LOL: , cuz most of the amps i have bought with that description, are beat all to hell, which is why i now disregard that statement when browsing
 
This amp has a variety of NOS tubes = We tossed in whatever we could find from the service room that would light up.

Smoke free is the best though. And this amp has never uttered a racial epithet, raised it's voice at an animal, or listened to Fox News. :lol: :LOL: :lol: :LOL:
 
:lol: :LOL:

I would change a few from the original post:

THIS STATEMENT: "This amp is an absolute bargain."
ACTUALLY MEANS: "I got this for a killer price as a demo model and I only ask 300$ more than what I paid for it."

to:

THIS STATEMENT: "This amp is an absolute bargain."
ACTUALLY MEANS: "I fell for the latest fad amp and need to dump this quick because it's not popular anymore."

or:

ACTUALLY MEANS: "I can't stand this amp, please take it off my hands quick"


this:


THIS STATEMENT: "I am only a home player now, so this is too much amp for my use."
ACTUALLY MEANS: " After spending 1000$ on power soaks, tubes, speakers and cables, I realise that the amp still sounds like crap. Also it has only 2 channels and 100W, I am gonna sell this to get a 3Ch 150W amp - ROCKN ROLL."

to:

THIS STATEMENT: "I am only a home player now, so this is too much amp for my use."
ACTUALLY MEANS: "I have another amp en route that will also be too much amp for me at home in about 2 weeks. Look for my for sale ad soon."


this:


THIS STATEMENT: "Amp has recently been retubed by a qualified amp tech"
ACTUALLY MEANS: "I bought this quad of tubes of the bay for cheap and my friend has a bias rite. We threw them in and the amp still sounds mushy and britty, I am fed up, now you buy it and try if you're more lucky. If you are I will hear your clips and think 'DAMN' and look out to buy another one of the same amp and get some proper tubes biased by a pro."

to:

THIS STATEMENT: "Amp has recently been retubed by a qualified amp tech"
ACTUALLY MEANS: "I needed to have this amp repaired, and in the process it was retubed."


this:


THIS STATEMENT: "This amp has never been gigged and is absolutely mint"
ACTUALLY MEANS: "I would never take this amp on stage, I don't wanna embarrass myself with such bad tone."

to:

THIS STATEMENT: "This amp has never been gigged and is absolutely mint"
ACTUALLY MEANS: "I'm a collector/flipper".


this:


THIS STATEMENT: "Only reason for selling is I have to thin the herd."
ACTUALLY MEANS: "I have already another amp on its way to me, and once this piece of crap has been sold I will get an Axe FX, a Tweaker and a 100W Metal Panel Marshall."

to:

THIS STATEMENT: "Only reason for selling is I have to thin the herd."
ACTUALLY MEANS: "This is the amp I hate the most/like the least/easiest to sell out of my collection".
 
Shiny_Surface":1k5ji2am said:
THIS STATEMENT: "Only reason for selling is I have to thin the herd."
ACTUALLY MEANS: "This is the amp I hate the most/like the least/easiest to sell out of my collection".
Or:

THIS STATEMENT: "Only reason for selling is I have to thin the herd."
ACTUALLY MEANS: "My wife saw the credit card and bank statements."
 
Shiny_Surface":37e8e6lj said:
THIS STATEMENT: "Amp has recently been retubed by a qualified amp tech"
ACTUALLY MEANS: "I bought this quad of tubes of the bay for cheap and my friend has a bias rite. We threw them in and the amp still sounds mushy and britty, I am fed up, now you buy it and try if you're more lucky. If you are I will hear your clips and think 'DAMN' and look out to buy another one of the same amp and get some proper tubes biased by a pro."

to:

THIS STATEMENT: "Amp has recently been retubed by a qualified amp tech"
ACTUALLY MEANS: "I needed to have this amp repaired, and in the process it was retubed."


THIS STATEMENT: "Amp has recently been retubed by a qualified amp tech"
ACTUALLY MEANS: "Has been retubed sometime within the last year or so. An amp tech may or may not have actually been involved."
 
THIS STATEMENT: "Sorry for the bad quality of the pictures, my camera is broken and I had to use my phone"
ACTUALLY MEANS: "This amp has so much tear and issues that I spent 3 hours in photoshop to make the pictures more blurry and undefined."
:lol: :LOL:
 
Heritage Softail":1l8j4to7 said:
This amp has a variety of NOS tubes = We tossed in whatever we could find from the service room that would light up.

Smoke free is the best though. And this amp has never uttered a racial epithet, raised it's voice at an animal, or listened to Fox News. :lol: :LOL: :lol: :LOL:

Ah, the liberal, democrat, goody-two-shoes, hand-holding amp :rock:

Fuck me, its an Obama Amp :lol: :LOL: :lol: :LOL:
 
"The amp is just not for me"

Means:" Not enough low end or compression for me to play it, makes me look bad"

"I just wanted to try it out"

Means "Looking for street cred and wanted to know what the hype is about so I can go on other forums to rail those fucks"
 
Statement: "I WILL own another one!"
Meaning: "I am saying this to save face while I have another map coming"
 
THIS STATEMENT: "I hate to sell this amp"
ACTUALLY MEANS: "I hate to sell this amp for this little, man the economy sucks"
 
Ooh, don't forget professionally packed.....

And throwing in a new quad of JJ's...

And.....near the top ---------- selling for a friend or my other guitarist :cheers2:
 
STUDIO: [actually means] my 10' x 12' bedroom at my mom and dad's place.

OFFERING TONES FROM FENDER/VOX CLEANS TO HARD HITTING PLEXI TO EXTREME NU-METAL: [actually means] I bought this amp thinking it would make me play better and I still suck.

PROFESSIONALLY MAINTAINED: [actually means] I bought it new from GC or MF and once I realized I still suck through it and blew $3000 on the head and the cab, I could use the money elsewhere (like, buy my first car) so it's basically had 10 hours at 0.5 to 1 on the mastervloume of action since it came out of the box.

Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh, folks - there's a ton of 'em.
V.
 
HIGHLY SOUGHT AFTER (or) IF YOU'RE LOOKING AT THIS AMP YOU KNOW HOW IN DEMAND THEY ARE: [actually means] Hopefully you won't do a search on this amp and see that there's about 20 of them for sale for a lot less and in better condition.

V.
 
Statement: Mint Condition!

Means: " Has been through 4-6 amp flipper street cred mongers and each one put towels under the feet, have no clue about the electronics but the headcase looks mint"
 
Are you guys going thru my threads to find these posts??

:lol: :LOL:

I am pretty truthful about selling.........

"I AM A GEAR WHORE AND JUST WANT SOMETHING NEW" :thumbsup:


How about:

QUOTE: "My amp is the greatest thing on the planet"
MEANS: " I am afraid to try new things and dont want to leave my comfort zone"

:lol: :LOL:


or


QUOTE: " NOT MY CUP O TEA"
MEANS: " THIS AMP SUCKS!!"

:D
 
Mailman1971":3v7kv7db said:
Are you guys going thru my threads to find these posts??

:lol: :LOL:




QUOTE: " NOT MY CUP O TEA"
MEANS: " THIS AMP SUCKS!!"

:D

I still think, NOT MY CUP OF TEA means "I STILL SUCK EVEN THOUGH I HAVE THIS AMAZINGLY COOL RIG".

V.
 
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