And look at you now. You have fucking made it. Pushing guitar cables as a side hustle to making pizzas.
As Bobby (your imaginary bassist that played with eric clapton, but says you have better tone) and the people that live at your house (your mom and sister) have attested, you have amazing guitar skills unparalleled by most.
You are shockingly adept at baseball and stock market analysis, rife with political acumen, maths skills that cannot be rivaled by princeton and other ivy league graduates, and let us not forget, speaker knowledge that trumps even jim at scumback speakers.
Honestly, it is surprising you aren't worshipped here. I know I think we should make a statue of your likeness in gold and worship it