Advice on a new song? Diezel Herbert clean content.

[spguitar]

Here's a rough draft of a 7 min song me and a friend are working on. We're just trying to get the "flow" of the song down. My wife said the drums in the 2nd verse that drop out just don't fit.
The ending(last 2 mins or so) is a simple little instrumental jam session.
We used a 1951 Gibson acoustic and my Fernandes Decade Elite with the sustainer. Mic'd everything including vocals with a Shure Beta 57.
Vocals were run into my line 6 x3 as a preamp then into a DBX 160X and into my Presonus Firestudio Project.
Bass is a Fender blacktop P bass into my Line 6 pod X3.
Synth is a M-audio Venom.
Shakers at the end are a box of Goldfish mac and cheese.

Criticisms/suggestions?

https://soundcloud.com/burnthelies/charade-rough-take1

 

[spguitar]

We're about to start tracking backup harmonies today. I may put the Herbert roar in that last double chorus... Not sure yet.

 

[John4021]

Nice,you could sell it as is.
But I guess more vocals,drums and maybe some Herbert high gain cant hurt.

 

[spguitar]

Take 2. Added many harmony vocals. Added drums and more guitars to the final chorus.
Decided against Herbert roar. Instead it's low gain channel 2.

https://soundcloud.com/burnthelies/charade-rough-take2