NoHassle
Well-known member
You gotta admit the production is first rate.
70 Mach 1
Well-known member
Heres to you inbred phoney iommi Dan stryker JTK.
At cigar lounge all nice like.
Got here early to get a seat for ladies night.
At cigar lounge all nice like.
Got here early to get a seat for ladies night.
JDs Couch
Well-known member
I hope you stay sober long enough to drive home, alcoholic.
70 Mach 1
Well-known member
70 Mach 1
Well-known member
JamesTiberiusKirk
Well-known member
Some drunks get maudlin
Some drunks get belligerent
Some drunks pass out and piss themselves
Some drunks get belligerent
Some drunks pass out and piss themselves
JamesTiberiusKirk
Well-known member
@JDs Couch
At least he isn't drinking out of a long stemmed glass tonight.
Hey @70 Mach 1, what's that cigar you're smoking? It looks green. Maybe it's just the lighting.
At least he isn't drinking out of a long stemmed glass tonight.
Hey @70 Mach 1, what's that cigar you're smoking? It looks green. Maybe it's just the lighting.
70 Mach 1
Well-known member
Just tried it tonight
CAO flathead 860
JamesTiberiusKirk
Well-known member
Found a review on the interwebs
Cigar Review: CAO flathead 860
Wrapper: Ecuadorian Shade-grown... maybe? Or wet cardboard.
Binder/Filler: Sweepings from a Dominican floor.
Price: Too much.
Pre-light Inspection:
The cigar arrived looking like it had been transported via a moped accident. The wrapper was wrinkled, reminiscent of a pug’s face, and possessed the scent of a wet blanket left in a hot car. The band features a "golden" logo that actually looks like it was printed with a dying inkjet printer from 1998.
First Third:
Upon lighting—which required a jet lighter and an act of God—the cigar unleashed a flavor profile I can only describe as "aggressive sulfur" and "forgotten campfire." The draw was tighter than my budget. It didn’t smoke so much as it struggled. I'm getting distinct notes of "dry cleaning chemical" and "burnt hair."
Second Third:
The cigar decided to tunnel, creating a hole down the center large enough to hide my regrets. The ash is gray, flaky, and landed instantly on my khaki pants. The flavor has evolved from "aggressive sulfur" to "aggressive sulfur, but now you’re eating it with a spoon." The nicotine strength is surprisingly high—a good thing, as it distracts you from the impending headache.
Final Third:
I stopped smoking at the halfway point, but I feel obligated to inform you that this stick has a "notes of octopus urine" finish. It’s like smoking a stick of hot garbage dipped in ammonia.
Verdict:
If you want to spend money to disappoint yourself, just throw a $20 bill into a storm drain. It’s cleaner, healthier, and provides the same amount of joy as this stick.
Rating: 0.5 / 10 (0.5 for staying lit long enough to be photographed before I threw it in the trash).
Cigar Review: CAO flathead 860Wrapper: Ecuadorian Shade-grown... maybe? Or wet cardboard.
Binder/Filler: Sweepings from a Dominican floor.
Price: Too much.
Pre-light Inspection:
The cigar arrived looking like it had been transported via a moped accident. The wrapper was wrinkled, reminiscent of a pug’s face, and possessed the scent of a wet blanket left in a hot car. The band features a "golden" logo that actually looks like it was printed with a dying inkjet printer from 1998.
First Third:
Upon lighting—which required a jet lighter and an act of God—the cigar unleashed a flavor profile I can only describe as "aggressive sulfur" and "forgotten campfire." The draw was tighter than my budget. It didn’t smoke so much as it struggled. I'm getting distinct notes of "dry cleaning chemical" and "burnt hair."
Second Third:
The cigar decided to tunnel, creating a hole down the center large enough to hide my regrets. The ash is gray, flaky, and landed instantly on my khaki pants. The flavor has evolved from "aggressive sulfur" to "aggressive sulfur, but now you’re eating it with a spoon." The nicotine strength is surprisingly high—a good thing, as it distracts you from the impending headache.
Final Third:
I stopped smoking at the halfway point, but I feel obligated to inform you that this stick has a "notes of octopus urine" finish. It’s like smoking a stick of hot garbage dipped in ammonia.
Verdict:
If you want to spend money to disappoint yourself, just throw a $20 bill into a storm drain. It’s cleaner, healthier, and provides the same amount of joy as this stick.
Rating: 0.5 / 10 (0.5 for staying lit long enough to be photographed before I threw it in the trash).
70 Mach 1
Well-known member
It sucks. Flat. No big flavor.
Prefer a Liga, la aroma di cuba or My Father line
JamesTiberiusKirk
Well-known member
Just in case, that review above was AI generated - meant to provoke laughter.
70 Mach 1
Well-known member
All true. It totally sucksFound a review on the interwebs
Wrapper: Ecuadorian Shade-grown... maybe? Or wet cardboard.
Binder/Filler: Sweepings from a Dominican floor.
Price: Too much.
Pre-light Inspection:
The cigar arrived looking like it had been transported via a moped accident. The wrapper was wrinkled, reminiscent of a pug’s face, and possessed the scent of a wet blanket left in a hot car. The band features a "golden" logo that actually looks like it was printed with a dying inkjet printer from 1998.
First Third:
Upon lighting—which required a jet lighter and an act of God—the cigar unleashed a flavor profile I can only describe as "aggressive sulfur" and "forgotten campfire." The draw was tighter than my budget. It didn’t smoke so much as it struggled. I'm getting distinct notes of "dry cleaning chemical" and "burnt hair."
Second Third:
The cigar decided to tunnel, creating a hole down the center large enough to hide my regrets. The ash is gray, flaky, and landed instantly on my khaki pants. The flavor has evolved from "aggressive sulfur" to "aggressive sulfur, but now you’re eating it with a spoon." The nicotine strength is surprisingly high—a good thing, as it distracts you from the impending headache.
Final Third:
I stopped smoking at the halfway point, but I feel obligated to inform you that this stick has a "notes of octopus urine" finish. It’s like smoking a stick of hot garbage dipped in ammonia.
Verdict:
If you want to spend money to disappoint yourself, just throw a $20 bill into a storm drain. It’s cleaner, healthier, and provides the same amount of joy as this stick.
Rating: 0.5 / 10 (0.5 for staying lit long enough to be photographed before I threw it in the trash).
JamesTiberiusKirk
Well-known member
Hey, AI is good for something. I could never write anything half as good as that, plus it would take me hours.
70 Mach 1
Well-known member
The couch can recite it on the fly
