Selling out my own bandmates. (long)

[peaveyT60]

well,
that's just the way it goes sometimes. 99% of the bands that are out there aren't there with their original lineup; u can't let people hold u back from reaching your goals, but it can be hard when it is your friends that are in the way. my advice is to take it one step at a time. go record the album and see what happens from there. you never know what's around the corner and what adjustments you'll have to make with your game plan.

good luck.

 

[Lord Toneking]

The only tough part about this is that they actually have some ownership in YOUR songs. Yes you wrote the songs BUT they played THEIR parts on them and probably feel very strongly that they are just as much their songs also...see what I'm sayin'??

I would graciously cut ties with them and persue this opportunity without hesitation. Give them credit on the recording and that's about all you can do. As Ralph said, I'd bust my ass in any and every way to find a way to go and make this happen...it's not like these kind of opportunties come about everyday. It sounds like you aren't 100% happy with their talents anyway to be in this for the long haul

Go do this, embrace it, and see what happens You're a damn good performer and player...Best of luck to ya bro!

 

[ejecta]

You just have different ambitions they they do Shea. If they wanted go and were willing to pay but you just went out there behind their back to be able to use better musicians then that would be wrong. But since they dont really want it that bad and you are being up front, that is by no means selling them out IMHO.

That said...... your concern for them shows that you have a good heart Shea. Don't ever lose that, no matter how far you go with your dreams.

Good luck bro!!!

 

[thenine]

I agree whith what everyone has said - but you do need to tell them. It is the right thing to do and hopefully they will understand. To be a stand-up dude you have to tell them.

9

 

[vchizzle]

Be straight up with them.

Tell them since no one is jumping on board with you for this opportunity, you have to get members that will. It's something you need to do and would be stupid not to take the opportunity. Whether they be session players, the other bass player that can sing, whoever...

You really don't need to address splitting up with the band at this point IMO. Even if its inevitable that you get new players. Make the current band aware that you're not sure where things will stand with them(as a band) once you record the album. Since they are not jumping onboard, you don't owe them anything else, even though you're friends. You don't know if they'll be capable of playing the material live(don't need to tell them that). After you're done recording you can figure out who will pull it off live for the best performance....that's 100% business decision whether any, all or none of them are involved. If they don't have the maturity level to understand that, it sucks, but it is what it is.

I have friends that split with a band member 5-6 years ago. They are still not on great terms. There have been deaths, marriages, kids and about everything else you could imagine happen in between and because one or more of them couldn't separate business from friendship they missed out being there for each other for all of those things. Really sad because they were always so close. Both sides had some level of success after the split too, so its not like they kicked someone out and that person withered away. To this day they are not real friends anymore, civil and ok to each other in passing, but don't hang out like they used too.

business is business. You need to take the opportunity with or without them. It seems they've made that decision for you already?

 

[ratter]

You've already paid their way once, which is more than most people would do. And it doesn't sound like they were very appreciative and don't truly understand what this opportunity might mean. You can only help people if they want to help themselves. So, my vote is to go for it and do what you have to do. If they were struggling to get there but truly couldn't because of money, work, family, whatever, that would be one thing. But that clearly isn't the case here.

 

[again with this]

dude. don't feel bad. if they lack the commitment to make it happen, it's on them that they aren't there.

You are obviously a player, movin' and shakin' trying to live your dream. Go for it. If they don't understand and respect that, they aren't your friends as much as hangers on and coat tail riders.

It's difficult dealing with friends in any kind of professional environment. It you are sure the product will be superior without them, then it's a no-brainer. This is your art, your craft and your future. Do what's best for you.

I know this is the hardest part... be honest with everyone. The truth shall set you free. Not brutally honest, like telling the bass player he's the weak link, but honest. The BCB bandmates should support your BTD efforts. If nothing else, the attention from each project can potentially draw attention and fans to the other.

Good luck bro. I wish I had your problems.

 

[Scott Ians Beard]

Go for it!

Ive not read all the replies, but you dont get many shots at things like this. Dont let them hold you back! If they are as much of a friend to you as you clearly are to them then they will understand. I bet a lot people wouldnt have the second thoughts you are having!

 

[Copperhead]

Go rent the movie "La Bamba"

 

[RO223]

You're not selling anybody out. The music business is tough and you have to jump on opportunities when they pop up. This is kind of a good thing for you to find out now, before your band goes any further and you have more at stake. The good news is you can still get out there and make this record and the fact that your soon to be ex bandmates don't have any drive won't kill it at the last minute.

Don't feel bad for wanting to be successful. If you tell these guys the deal and they already understand a career in music is your goal, they will understand this situation (they are letting YOU down, not the other way around). It might be uncomfortable but eventually they will understand. Maybe you can even salvage the band (to play afterward) but get a super tight recording with some pros for your trouble!

 

[King Guitar]

F m', if they stiffed me from the NAMM trip I would of choked em both out with a Spectraflex and hit the long winding road. But hey thats just me, I am an x-Marine

B

 

[mctallica1]

Do it and be honest/upfront with your bandmates.

One sure thing in the music biz is: never, repeat NEVER pass up an opportunity to further your career. There just aren't that many great opportunities out there.

But always do it with ethics and character.

 

[squealie]

Do it and be honest/upfront with your bandmates.

One sure thing in the music biz is: never, repeat NEVER pass up an opportunity to further your career. There just aren't that many great opportunities out there.

But always do it with ethics and character.

yup, just like this^ and the other responses.

Do it, or you'll regret it forever. This may not even turn into anything (devil's adv) but, if you don't, you'll never forgive yourself.

Go kick some ass son.

 

[Telephant]

Thanks for the support guys! I needed to get all that stuff off my mind and vent the other night and I feel better, but I still havent told my bandmates yet. Im being a huge pussy about it.

I just know they're going to get butthurt and talk some shit and I know they're going to feel like I turned my back on them... But they all obviously lack commitment.

So if all goes as plan, I should be flying out on Thursday. Any of you LA guys have a Mojave Peacemaker or a Komet I could rent for the session?

 

[Juggernaut]

Good Luck Shea, cant wait hear what you do..... It'll be awesome, I have no doubt about it.

 

[Anonymous]

Thanks for the support guys! I needed to get all that stuff off my mind and vent the other night and I feel better, but I still havent told my bandmates yet. Im being a huge pussy about it.

I just know they're going to get butthurt and talk some shit and I know they're going to feel like I turned my back on them... But they all obviously lack commitment.

So if all goes as plan, I should be flying out on Thursday. Any of you LA guys have a Mojave Peacemaker or a Komet I could rent for the session?

In all seriousness, Shea, you're welcome to my PeaceMaker or anything else I own for the session. I'm less than an hour south of LA... No problem at all...

Steve

 

[chakosh]

I just know they're going to get butthurt and talk some shit and I know they're going to feel like I turned my back on them... But they all obviously lack commitment.

Dude they'll be butthurt about it either way. But, like has been said... They're not as serious as you are about this, and still owe you a sizable chunk of $$ for what you've already done for them.

 

[Inearthed]

Having been in bands with people that just want to do the bare minimum, contribute the bare minimum and never really do anything... I feel your pain! Reminds me of being in bands with people that never want to pony up cash for a practice space, or buy anything over a $150 1x12 crappy combo amp, yet are more than willing to drop endless amounts of money on important things like big screen TV's, weed, or imported Anime DVD Box Sets (seriously!)

Sounds really cruel but the best way to do it would be to cut your losses and move on. You can still be friends (and I'm sure that there will be some sandy vaginas for a little while) but it'll be better for you in the long run. Find some people that are willing to put as much into it as you are.

 

[Code001]

Go for it. You may never have this chance again, man! If they really are your friends, they'll understand.

 

[Digital Jams]

Thanks for the support guys! I needed to get all that stuff off my mind and vent the other night and I feel better, but I still havent told my bandmates yet. Im being a huge pussy about it.

I just know they're going to get butthurt and talk some shit and I know they're going to feel like I turned my back on them... But they all obviously lack commitment.

So if all goes as plan, I should be flying out on Thursday. Any of you LA guys have a Mojave Peacemaker or a Komet I could rent for the session?

In all seriousness, Shea, you're welcome to my PeaceMaker or anything else I own for the session. I'm less than an hour south of LA... No problem at all...

Steve

That is killer you can do that Steve!

Do us proud boy and grip it and rip it Shea!!!!