Music Jokes

[BeZo]

Once upon a time, when I was but a young shit, I bought my first real bass. It was a red Schecter Stiletto 4 string I got from Guitar Center. It was my first neck through bass, and the first bass I bought new. I couldn't put it down. I wanted to play it all night.

I was playing it in my jam room when my neighbor popped in to announce they were running to McDonald's. I decided to join, bass strapped to my chest, and climbed into the back seat of his girlfriend's car. We go through the drive through, and we all order, as I'm shaping away on the bass. Finally, we pulled up to the drive through window, and my buddy turns around and says, "Money!"

Without missing a beat, I started playing the bassline to the Pink Floyd song.

What was the best punchline you ever played on your instrument?

 

[GJgo]

You know the best way to get your guitarist to turn down?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
..Put sheet music in from of them.

 

[rsm]

 

[rsm]

 

[DISTORT6]

Drummers.

 

[TheBiggestJerk]

How do you help a drowning drummer?

Throw him his kit.

 

[stratjacket]

 

[romanianreaper]

What do you hear when you drop a piano down a mine shaft?




A flat miner

 

[TheBiggestJerk]

What do you hear when you drop a piano down a mine shaft?




A flat miner

Diminished returners.

 

[Beyond Black]

How do you know when a drum riser is level?
Drool’s coming out of both sides of the drummers mouth.

What’d the drummer get on his IQ test?
Drool…

 

[thegame]

What do Glenn Fricker’s guitar playing and lactating bitch tits have in common?

Both have nothing but sour notes

 

[TheBiggestJerk]

What do Glenn Fricker’s guitar playing and lactating bitch tits have in common?

Both are nothing but sour notes

Ewwww… (I think I pulled a facial muscle puckering)

 

[BeZo]

We used to close our set with this song. We would feedback and hype the crowd up with, "You wanna hear one more?! YOU WANNA HEAR ONE MORE?!"

And then play this:

 

[TheBiggestJerk]

Ewwww… (I think I pulled a facial muscle puckering)

May have hurt my back too from the recoil. I think I have literary whiplash.

 

[Frehley12]

A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection. Judge asks, "First offender?"
She replied: "No, first a Gibson, and then a Fender."

 

[romanianreaper]

What's better than roses on a piano?





Tulips on an organ......

 

[BeZo]

No, I mean like...

Bah-dum tiss

 

[stratjacket]

Close enough to a music joke

 

[ihave27frets]

Drummers.

 

[thegame]

Prog Drummers.

ihave27tomtoms