Divorce ...

JimAnsell2 said:
Congrats. i don't even need to know the details, CONGRATS TO YOU! marriage is fucking dumb, and out dated. relationships should be allowed to, and expected to just run their course, and not be essentially a "forever" legal agreement.

i'm coming up on my 2nd year being divorced, 3ish separated after a 22 year relationship right out of high school.
Everything got so much better so fast after i got divorced. everyone told me it would, but more has changed in 2 years than in like 15 in that marriage.
I've been given the freedom of being able to live my life by my own rules and without a toxic mother like figure always passing on her own shame, judgement, and insecurities on to me.

Freedom in life is very important for over all happiness.
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Yup! So true. Went thru it
 
I will say that the marriage was fun, until it wasnt, and when it became clear it wasnt going to work i couldnt get out of there quick enough. i was ecstatic the day i left and knowing it will be legally over soon is the cherry on top. :rock: :rock: :rock:
 
BABMusic said:
You really got to establish the boundaries early on as the man. Our marriage is definitely not "happy wife, happy life" -- more like "happy king, happy kingdom". Is there still risk in my situation? Sure. Women are always women. However, you can reduce your risk if you know what signs to watch out for and if you set the boundaries early. I learned the hard way when I was young that if you don't set the boundaries, she'll never accept your changes later on. It does make me happy to see fewer men getting married, as we do need to get rid of the state's involvement in it and we need to get rid of alimony. Divorce is also a huge booming business for lawyers (disgusting).

Anyway, glad you're feeling better after the divorce. I know the feeling of leaving a bad relationship and it feels like being born again. :D
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I would imagine that every divorced man felt he had set the boundaries with his better half until she decided not to honor them then unleashed the legal system. The state(family courts) will always give your bride the upper hand in almost every case.

 
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That's all very true. I think another big part of it is that there's a lot of women in western culture who want things to be equal and are into things like feminism and celebrating independence. Those kinds of women are not going to want to follow the lead of their husband. Am I saying there's no good western women? Absolutely not. I'm just suggesting, you may have to dig deep for the gold.
 
i met my ex when i was 17. i didn't know fuck all about boundries back then. I learned a lot about life and human psychology in the last few years.
My current relationship is just over a year old, and there have been zero fights or drama because we both came out of shitty situations and know exactly what not to put up with for a second. We have a really good understanding of each other, and not just because we took mushrooms together on our 3rd or 4th date :ROFLMAO:
 
BABMusic said:
That's all very true. I think another big part of it is that there's a lot of women in western culture who want things to be equal and are into things like feminism and celebrating independence. Those kinds of women are not going to want to follow the lead of their husband. Am I saying there's no good western women? Absolutely not. I'm just suggesting, you may have to dig deep for the gold.
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Unfortunately any woman can become like 'those kinds of women', no matter how you lead and how strong the boundaries are set, how much money you make because they will always have the option to do so.

My grandfather had 7 wives in his lifetime, I would consider him the miner of that gold of which you are referring.:LOL:
 
My divorce was equally the best and worst thing I’ve ever experienced in my life.

Left my house with only my guitars and clothes, split the sale of the house down the middle and bought 4 guitars the day the money was deposited in my account. Life’s been on a steady incline ever since and I’m borderline cutthroat with how I spend my time these days. That divorce also gave me the biggest IDGAF card one can carry.
 
And then there are idiots like me who got divorced and then got married again, lol. It is different when you do it a second time and although no relationships are easy, you learn what you like and don't like and are more prepared to deal with stuff. If I ever got another divorce, I would be better equipped to handle things and not take it so personal. Life is tough and things happen.

I didn't enjoy being single because it just seemed to cause more frustration trying to figure out how to act and how to be. I'd just enjoy spending time with friends and family and play a lot of guitar!
 
LP Freak said:
Wow, this thread sounds like it should have been a poll. So how many of you have been divorced? :LOL:
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Well....... I'll just state the current marriage statistics.....and it's been at these levels for quite a few years. Men can only cut their wealth in half so many times before they stop putting themselves in that situation.
50-60% Divorce rate for 1st time marriages depending on who is doing the stats
70-75% Divorce rate for 2nd marriages
75% and above Divorce rate for 3rd marriages

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